Articles & Resources

HIA Welcomes October 2025 Graduates Into Alumni Association

We are thrilled to celebrate seven incredible men and women who have completed the Hope is Alive program this October! This month, we proudly recognize three graduates from Tulsa, two from Weatherford, one from Dallas, and one from Oklahoma City!

So far in 2025, 38 residents have reached this life-changing milestone. Since the very beginning of Hope is Alive, an inspiring 291 individuals have graduated!

Our alumni association is rapidly growing, and with it, a powerful community of men and women who continue to live out the principles they learned in our program. These alumni are mentoring current residents, serving in their churches, rebuilding families, and showing others that recovery and lasting freedom are possible.

At Hope is Alive, our recovery homes are more than just places to live. We intentionally create communities and environments where radical life change is possible. In our homes, residents find structure, accountability, and encouragement through a faith-based, three-phase program designed to help them grow spiritually, emotionally, and personally.

But the support of Hope is Alive doesn’t end when residents graduate.

According to Julie Quinlan, senior leadership and development manager at HIA, “The alumni association is an instrumental part of Hope is Alive. After a resident graduates from our program and moves out of our homes, it is vital for them to have a community of like-minded people to connect with. The alumni association not only builds community and lifelong friendships, but is also a great resource for when our alumni struggle with any area of life.”

The mission of Hope is Alive is to radically change the lives of drug addicts and alcoholics — and that mission is gaining momentum.‍

Know someone who needs help? Reach out today! We're here and ready to walk this journey with them.

Never forget: hope is alive.

Faith Over Fear

Faith over fear. How many times have we heard this phrase? I know I've heard and read it hundreds of times. It's on t-shirts, mugs, signs, bags, hats, jewelry, journals, keychains, and so much more. Because I see this phrase all the time, I never really stop to think about what it truly means.​

So what does it really mean?

To understand what it means to have faith over fear, we must first understand how fear affects us. Our fears drive us to control. When we are fearful, we enter “fix-it” mode. We feel that if we can control the situation, then we will no longer be worried, anxious, or fearful. We associate control with everything being okay again.

But the opposite is true. Our fear and control cause us to go crazy, because 10 out of 10 times, our trying to control situations/people doesn’t work. Sometimes, we even make the situation worse. The truth is, we need to surrender our control and have FAITH in the One who has the power and control. That’s what it means to have faith over fear.

Faith is trusting and believing in God’s plan. We do not see the whole picture — we just see a part of it. God sees and knows the entire plan, and we must have the FAITH to trust Him. We must not allow our fear to drive us to control.

“For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” Isaiah 41:13

Under Addiction’s Control

Addiction controls the person and ALL those around.

I recently heard someone share that statement with me, and I believe it to be 100% true. When addiction hits our homes, it not only controls the one struggling with substances but also those who love that person.

That statement reminds me of a marionette. The person controlling the strings above is the addiction, and the puppets below are the ones impacted by the addiction: family and friends. Our lives become consumed and dictated by addiction. Addiction tells us what to do, what not to do, how we should act, how we should not act, how we should feel, how we should not feel, where we should be, and where we should not be. The list goes on and on. ​

To get out from under addiction’s control, we must cut the strings. A marionette cannot be controlled without strings. 

But how do we cut the strings?

First, we have to recognize and acknowledge that we are being controlled by addiction. Then, we must do the hard thing and detach ourselves from it (i.e. cut the strings). We also need to set boundaries that protect us financially, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually (If I feel… then I will), as well as seek professional counseling or therapy. Don’t be afraid to say you need help!

Remember, you can do hard things and give yourself grace. Cry if you need to. Scream if you need to. Do what you need to do. And continue to stay connected to a local or Zoom Finding Hope group.

“May the Lord give strength to his people! May the Lord bless his people with peace!” Psalm 29:11

The Roles We Play in Addiction

When we love someone who is addicted to drugs or alcohol, it’s easy to take on roles that were not designed for us. It’s easy to take on roles that we create rather than just the one God assigned us.

God designed us to play one important role in our loved ones’ lives.

Maybe it's mom.

Maybe it’s son.

Maybe it’s wife.

Maybe it’s brother.

Maybe it’s grandmother.

Maybe it’s friend.

Whatever it is, God designed us to play that specific role only. But how often do we forget what living one role looks like? 

When our loved ones struggle, we begin to take on the roles of therapist, sponsor, nurse, secretary, life-coach, maid, investigator, banker, shopper, and/or taxi driver. We do everything and anything to feel like we are helping them. But we are not honoring God or helping our loved ones when we take on the roles we are not called to be.

If we take on roles that God has not designed for us, then we are not able to fulfill the roles that He has designed for us.

God created us for a purpose. He selected us as our loved ones’ mom, son, wife, brother, grandmother, friend, etc. for a reason. So, ask God to remind you of what that role looks like, and ask Him for the strength to get back to that role.

“Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches.” 1 Corinthians 7:17

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Navigating Change During Addiction Recovery

Nothing changes if nothing changes.

Have you heard that sentence before? Have you stopped to think about what it means?

If you keep doing what you're doing, you're going to keep getting the same results you're currently getting.

It seems simple. But if it’s simple, why is it so hard? It’s hard because change can be scary.

If you want to lose weight, you can’t keep eating the same things you have been eating, and you can’t keep sitting on your couch. You have to make daily changes in what you are doing to see results. It isn’t easy at first, but the end result is worth it. Does it happen overnight? No. But can you see change over time? Yes.

The same thing applies to our loved ones. If something doesn’t change, you are going to be stuck in the same cycle, completely miserable. Just like losing weight isn’t easy, addiction recovery isn’t easy either. 

That’s where Finding Hope comes in. Finding Hope is a support group for loved ones of addicts and alcoholics. It’s a community that will be there with you each step of the way. They will be there to encourage you, support you, listen to you, and pray with you.

So, what do you need to change? What have you been telling yourself? Think about what could happen if you actually listen to yourself and make a change.

Today is the day to begin changing things. Maybe it’s setting a firm boundary. Maybe it's no longer fixing the problems that aren’t yours to fix. Maybe you stop the enabling behavior you keep telling yourself you are going to stop. Or, maybe you are going to start saying “yes” to yourself and “no” to others. Whatever it is, do it.

Nothing changes if nothing changes.

“I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13

How People Hurt People

You’ve probably heard the saying, “Hurt people hurt people.” It’s one of those phrases that sounds simple, but the more you think about it, the more complex it becomes.

When we’re carrying pain, it often spills out onto others. Maybe we’re short with someone who didn’t do anything wrong. Maybe we try to get even with the addict we love. Or maybe we just shut down completely and push people away. Sometimes we don’t even realize it — we’re just reacting from a place that’s already hurting.

And the same thing happens the other way around. People who are hurting will sometimes hurt us. Our loved ones turn to addiction because of a hurt they don’t know how to heal, in turn hurting everyone around them. It’s not that they want to hurt us — it’s that they don’t always realize they are. 

Pain has a way of multiplying if we don’t deal with it in a healthy way. Something someone said, a betrayal, a deep loss — whatever it is — if we don’t process it, it can show up later in ways we don’t expect. We start snapping at people. We grow distant. We hold grudges. We assume the worst. Before we know it, we’re not only hurting from something, but also hurting others because of it.

That’s the cycle. And the only way to stop it is to recognize what’s really going on inside of us.

We can’t control other people, but we can control how we respond to them. We can set healthy boundaries, step back from chaos, show ourselves love, stop reacting impulsively, and seek forgiveness when we realize we’ve caused pain. These choices lead us toward healing, peace, joy, and ultimately — hope.

“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31–32

How Addiction Impacts Trust

When we love someone with a substance use disorder, we quickly lose all trust. I say it all the time, you lose trust in bucketfuls and gain it back in teaspoons. But today I want to ask you, where do you put your trust?

We should not put our trust in earthly things, but rather put our trust in God. But how many times have we tried to do God's job for Him? How many times have we gotten in His way for His perfect plan?

I remember standing in my friend’s kitchen crying when my husband was at the peak of his addiction, but I also remember telling her that I knew God had a plan and I believed someday I would get to help another wife going through this same storm. What I didn’t know was that I would quit my dream job as a kindergarten teacher and work for a non-profit organization where I get to give HOPE to so many families. God does have a plan, and we must trust His plan.

One Finding Hope member said, “I pray for God to close the right doors and open the right doors for my son.” That statement made me think. If we start closing doors for our loved ones on our own, are they the right doors that God has planned to be shut? If we start opening doors for our loved ones, are they the right doors that God has planned to be open?

Each day, each hour, each minute, each second, place your loved one back in God’s hands and trust in God’s perfect plan. We must let go and let God.

“Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act.” Psalm 35:7

Discovering Addiction

I’ll never forget when I discovered my husband was addicted to alcohol.

I still remember all the feelings I had when I found my husband standing in our garage with a bottle of vodka in his hand. Is he an alcoholic? What does that mean? What now? Is this what our life is going to be like? How can this be? What did I do? Will I ever be happy again? Why is he doing this to our family? Why? How? I don’t understand.

Some of us have been on this journey for many years, while others are just beginning. In a decade, here is what I learned:

• Addiction doesn't discriminate. Addiction doesn’t care about anyone’s family history or upbringing; it doesn’t care about anyone’s economic status or genetic makeup. It will go after anyone AND everyone. Satan has come to steal, kill, and destroy. He wants our families to be broken. He wants addiction to destroy families.
• I am not alone. Of the millions upon millions of people addicted to drugs or alcohol, there is a mom, dad, sister, brother, wife, husband, son, daughter, grandparent, praying and pleading that addiction ends. We need each other, and we need our Finding Hope family and community. You are not alone.
• Recovery is a lifelong journey. Just because our loved ones find sobriety, our own recovery journey will never end. The tools we learn at Finding Hope are for life. It is very easy to relapse into our old behaviors (codependency, enabling, boundaries, lack of self-care, etc.) when we don’t actively pursue our own recovery. There will be bumps and detours on this journey, but the stronger our recovery is, the easier those detours will be.
• God will use our storms. God has a plan and purpose for each of us. He has a plan and purpose for our loved ones. He will use this storm for His glory and purpose. We must trust Him through it all and allow Him to be our compass through the storm. Give it to God and allow Him to do only what He can do.
• There is HOPE. We have to remember to place our hope in Jesus. He is our ultimate comforter and healer. He can give us strength when we feel like we have nothing left to give. His love for us and our loved ones is firm, secure, and unfailing. Through Finding Hope, I have witnessed HOPE return to moms, dads, grandmothers, grandfathers, wives, husbands, sisters, and brothers. They have placed their hope in Jesus, found peace and serenity, and are living happy lives. We must keep our hope anchored in Him.

If you are not filled with hope, joy, and peace, my prayer is that you would get there soon. Stay connected to your Finding Hope family, continue down your own road of recovery, ask God to use your storm, and place your HOPE in Him today.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13

Automatic Negative Thinking

Did you know that we can rewire our brains and thinking patterns? Think of the analogy of an ANT at a picnic. One ANT is annoying, but a group of ANTs can ruin a picnic. Did you know that you become an ANT with Automatic Negative Thinking?

When we love someone addicted to drugs or alcohol, it is easy to become an ANT. Our thought patterns continually become negative, which brings us down and others around us down as well. We become depressed, fearful, angry, lonely, and sick. The negative thought pattern keeps the adrenal chemicals looping and diminishes the ability to problem solve. It becomes unhealthy. We become unhealthy.

So, how do we stop being ANTs?

It takes consistently and intentionally redirecting our thoughts. But we can do it.

• Start each day by expressing gratitude. Write it, speak it, share it.
• Intentionally activate smile muscles. Whether or not you “feel happy,” you need to make a conscious decision to engage in things that make you laugh (i.e., watch laughing baby videos, laughing yoga, etc.). Smiling and laughing redirect the synapses and produce calming chemicals in your brain, offsetting the stress loop chemicals.
• Do DEEP breathing exercises. Any exercise/deep breathing done regularly releases endorphins that activate the vagus nerve, which is connected to every major system.
• Reaffirm out loud who you are from God’s perspective. “I am a child of God. I am loved by God. I am beautifully and wonderfully made. I am amazing.” Even if you do not believe it, speak it every day.

With our ANT (automatic negative thinking) behavior, our brain feels and responds to things in a negative way. So, we must rewire our brains to automatic POSITIVE thinking (APT). With positive thinking, we can begin to find peace, joy, happiness, hope, and life again, no matter what our loved one is or is not doing.

You have a choice each day. Are you going to be an ANT or an APT?

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” Psalm 139:14

Admitting You Love an Addict

You may see the signs that your loved one is addicted to drugs or alcohol, but have you been able to admit it? If you can’t admit that your loved one is an addict, then you are directly prohibiting your addicted loved one from admitting they need help.

Oftentimes, shame and guilt keep us from admitting that our family isn’t perfect. We worry that others will look down on us and about the potential judgments that might come with it. But, if those people want to judge us, then we are wasting our time and breath on that relationship.

What happens when we admit we have a problem? We experience freedom, healing, and HOPE. You no longer have to hide the secret. Instead, you can live in truth and honesty. You are able to breathe again. And the funny thing is, once you admit your family has a problem, others will come along and say, “Me too!”

You’re only as sick as your secrets. Who wants to be sick and weighed down by life? Not me. As we admit our problem, freedom and healing come with it. You will soon learn you are not alone and will never have to face this storm alone again. Through transparency and openness, you will find hope and healing. Admission of your problem also provides a great opportunity to learn from those who have been through it in a community of people who get it.

Are you ready to heal? Are you ready to surrender? Are you ready to admit your family has a problem?

“Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses.” 1 Timothy 6:12

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Removing the Mask: Finding Freedom in Christ

If you feel the pressure to appear perfect or to hide your true self, Removing the Mask: Finding Freedom in Christ is for you. If you are an addict or love someone with a substance use disorder, know that there is hope. Through God’s word, you’ll discover how to recognize the masks you wear and what it means to let God into the places you’ve tried to keep hidden. Freedom is possible.

Start the plan here: Removing the Mask: Finding Freedom in Christ

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Hope in Motion: 2025 Run for Hope Recap and Highlights

Run For Hope 2025, hosted by Finding Hope and Hope After Loss, didn’t just break attendance records (1,482 people!) — it was another big step in a mission that’s doing real work for people affected by addiction and grief. Families, friends, and supporters showed up in Oklahoma City, Tulsa, Weatherford, and even virtually from neighborhoods, parks, and gyms across the country to honor and remember those who have lost their lives to addiction.

An Astounding Turnout

In Oklahoma City, 730 runners filled Stars and Stripes Park, Tulsa welcomed 372 participants to the Riverwalk, and in Weatherford, 185 runners gathered at First Baptist Church. And we can’t forget the 195 virtual participants who made the event their own — meeting in neighborhoods, parks, and local gyms to honor their loved ones.

Together, across all markets, we honored 135 loved ones.

The Fight Against Addiction is Alive

Beyond the numbers, what stood out most was the sense of community. Whether crossing a finish line, cheering from the sidelines, or sharing a story, every participant reminded us why Run For Hope matters: to honor the past, stand together in the present, and run with hope for the future.

There’s something powerful that happens when people gather with a shared purpose. Families who had never met before hugged like old friends because they instantly understood each other’s pain. And as strangers swapped stories and wiped tears away, we all became family. 

If you or someone you love is battling or has battled addiction, know that you are not alone. Reach out to Hope is Alive today. We have support groups for you, regardless of your situation, and we want to walk alongside you on your journey to recovery.